Which is the rational response. That's true. But, you see, I have been complaining about things far beyond the sullen-teenager spectrum. Oh, yes.
I am that person that gets annoyed at tourists on the Metro. I NEVER wanted to be that person. I get off for my internship at Woodley Park, which happens to be the zoo stop. Meaning, there are a lot of fanny-packs and A LOT of people who stand on the left.
Now, listen. I've been riding the metro my entire life. My Dad's a metro pro. Any time we were on there, there is no way he put up with any of that crap with us. We stood on the right. We walked on the left. I am pretty sure that at age five I thought you could be arrested for standing on the left.
If I ever enter local politics I am totally making that into law.
I'm nice about it. I'm not exactly screaming, "MOVE!" and drop-kicking people. I'm non-confrontational, and I'll say, "Excuse me!" cheerily and then, in the interest of their cultural education, throw out, "Left side's for walking, right side's for standing!" as I speed down the escalator. Most tourists at Woodley are clinging desperately to the rail, because that escalator is crazily long and steep. But I grew up at Wheaton, running down the longest single span escalator in the Western Hemisphere. My dad walks down it reading a book.
Okay, he's a little crazy, but seriously. Suck it up, tourists.
See what I mean?
Crotchety.
